Making things happen.

Hello again everyone!

Spring break is over. It was a nice little vacation even though I didn't actually go anywhere. I wasn't ready to start back today, but alas, I caught another little break. My Spanish class was cancelled today. This gave me the opportunity to do some research (and grab a Vitamin Water and Kashi bar) and figure out how to change my major. All I had to do was email the undergraduate coordinator for the psychology department and go from there. So I just emailed him and I'm currently waiting to hear back.

I sure hope this works. I hope I haven't ruined my GPA enough to not be able to change majors. I hope I haven't really screwed myself over as far as my college education goes. I know my parents would flip out if they knew how badly I'm doing in school. I mean it could be worse, but this isn't like me at all. But y'know, when you live 45 minutes away from your school, and your whole life is in a completely different city, it's easy to get behind, to lose interest, to not care. And don't get me wrong, I care. I just have trouble getting motivated. But maybe this major change thing will help out a lot. Maybe if I can start taking class I really enjoy - like the upper level psych classes, maybe some more English courses - I can start finding the motivation to succeed.

I have a feeling things are going to get better though. John will be going to Coastal in the fall. I not looking forward to him being gone AT ALL, but in a way it will eliminate one of my biggest distractions (yes babe, you are a distraction, but a damn good one :] ). So maybe then I can really focus on school and not spend so much time in Greenville. Jamie is also an issue - not the bad kind, she's just my best friend and like John, she's a good distraction. But it's okay. When John leaves, I'll probably have a set schedule and I'll just make certain times I can hang out with her and the rest of the time I'm going to devote to school. I feel confident about this. I can do this.

I'm so glad there's only like 5 more weeks of school. This first year at Clemson was not at all what I wanted it to be, but it's coming to an end and I feel like I'm getting the opportunity to make changes and better myself. I'm looking forward to it.

So here we go! Now I'm off to chemistry. Wish me luck with this psychology thing. Later!

Just an update.

Hello and good morning to everyone. Haven't been on here in a while, and if anyone really reads this, I apologize. But life has been pretty damn hectic since my last post. Christmas break flew by, and I had to dive right in to the spring semester here at Clemson. It certainly hasn't been a walk in the park though. Quite the opposite actually. John's aunt passed away, and even though she wasn't my relative, it affected me a good bit - mostly because it put a lot of stress on my relationship with John. But alas, she isn't suffering anymore and John and I made it through the storm.

So that brings me here. Today is my last day of class before spring break, and I'm feeling really good about life. I just recently decided to change my major to psychology, to try something a little more on my level. I haven't spoken to my advisor yet, and it looks like I'm going to have to wait until after spring break, but I'm doing it. I'm not doing well in the science department - I really don't think it's my thing - and it sucks because I would love to go into the medical field. But I'm at a point in my life where I feel like I should (at the risk of sounding cliche) go in a different direction. Even if that means giving up my nursing dream, or even gynecology. I'll get there eventually. But psychology is something I've always enjoyed, and I've never struggled with it. Plus, according to all the research I've done, there are tons of employment opportunities (good ones), and the pay is actually pretty good. So I'm really looking forward to going after this.

I think I'm just at a point in my life where I'm really figuring out who I am and what I want and don't want. I want a good job and to be happy. I want to live near the beach in a nice house and have a nice car. But I don't want to kill myself in school to do it. I don't want to sit around studying a bunch of material that bores me just to fail my tests and spend and extra two years in college. I could be going to grad school instead. So that's what I'm going to do.

I'm also not going to waste my time with people who aren't going to help me. I have a handful of people that I'm close to, who really know me, and who truly care about me. I love these people with all my heart, and there isn't really room for anyone else. I don't want to be surrounded with silly and unnecessary drama. I have parents who care about me, and my relationship with them continues to grow on a daily basis. Now that I'm getting older and becoming an adult, we all seem to be getting along better and understanding each other. We're actually having fun these days. In fact, a lot of fun. I'm actually going to two concerts with my dad this year (Tom Petty AND Iron Maiden), and that never happens.

I also have a boyfriend who loves me very much, and I'm blessed to have him in my life. Sure, we have our ups and downs just like any couple, but somehow, we manage to get closer and closer every single day. And then I have my best friend Jamie. She's the best friend I could've ever asked for. She's almost ten years older than me with four kids, but she is the greatest. We have an awesome relationship. I can tell her anything and vice versa. We actually teach each other things about life, and it's helping us both grow. I really hope I never lose her.

So that's my reflection for the day. For the month. Until I can come back to this blog. Hopefully I can start posting on a more regular basis, especially since school will be winding down soon. Until then, I'm going to go enjoy my spring break and hopefully get a lot accomplished. So, here I go. Got a positive outlook on life and I'm ready to get started. Let's do this!